Okay, so I think I am ready to do this.
We are going to work on the rest of 2006. I miscarried on February 1, 2006.
I went to see my OB on August 18, 2006, because I had had a period every 14 days for 2 months. Yes, ugh. He ordered lots of blood work (something I have gotten VERY used to! His lab tech and I had a great friendship! ha!) I had to go back 2 or 3 times that month for blood work, and on 8-28-06 he performed an endometrial biopsy to see if I was ovulating.
Got the results on 9-5-06 that I was in fact not ovulating. He asked if I wanted him to try a few things he could try in his office, or did I want to go to the RE. Of course I wanted to go to him. We already had a great relationship. His wife was my boss and his office was across the street from where I work. What a blessing!
I was so clueless. My husband wasn't even at that appointment with me. He wasn't at the endometrial biopsy either. Like I said, I was clueless. I was naive. I REALLY though my OB could fix me with a few pills. "There isn't something really wrong with me."
No diagnosis yet.
Went home and told my husband that I wasn't ovulating and that we had 2 choices........Go to RE or let OB do what he can. We both agreed to let OB do what he could.
Started 50mg of clomid 10-4-06.
Hot flashes like crazy. No one but my husband and I knew that I was taking the pills. My dad was so sick that I did not want to give my mom one more thing to worry about. And we couldn't tell my husband's parents with out telling mine. So we told no one.
Got my first negative pregnancy test on 11-6-06. Still hadn't started my period on 11-18-06. Started progesterone to start my period.
Took 100 mgs of clomid starting on 12-3-06. I only thought I had hot flashes before. I had lots of blood work this month. I really learned about cycle days and which day what happens. ha. (After all of this, I feel like I could be an OB. Okay, not really, but you know what I mean!)
I started my period very early and started my next round of clomid 150 mg on 12-19-06.
First time my husband went to the OB with me was for my 2nd ever vaginal ultrasound on 12-27-06. I remember this day like it was yesterday. 12-24-06 my husband and I were at my parent's house. It was the last time I talked to my dad and he was very alert and knew who I was. He was looking SO forward to that Christmas. My husband and I left that night and spent the night at our house which was half way between my parents and his parents. One 12-25-06 my mom called and my dad had gone into the hospital in the middle of the night because hospice could not handle his pain at home. He was fine when I left. She encouraged us to go have Christmas with my husband's family. We did. Then my husband's parent's and my husband and I drove 5 hours the next day to go see my dad. My husband's parents spent the day at my mom's house working on things that needed to be fixed. I told you they are awesome! My mom knew I had an appointment with my OB, but she didn't know why. She just knew I was having periods more frequently than I should and he was going to fix me. I went by the hospital to see my dad knowing it might be the last time I would see him, then we drove 3 hours to the OBs office for the ultrasound. My body just doesn't like clomid. I don't respond at all to it. Just for you infertility gurus, my follicles were 2.07, 1.27, 1.24, and 1.42. For you non fertility treatment gurus, they need to be between 15 and 20 to ovulate. But I did not know that. I was clueless. I really thought I was going to get pregnant. My husband and I drove the 3 hours back the next day and my sweet husband spent new years eve spending the night in the hospital with my dad so my mom could go home and get some sleep.
I had more blood work on 1-2-07 that confirmed that I didn't ovulate.
This was my hardest week ever to be at work. I knew my dad was 3 hours away dying. My husband and I went back that weekend to see my dad and he passed away on 1-7-06. I was supposed to have a pregnancy test that week at my OBs office. I called and he said to send my husband to get a home pregnancy test. So I did. And it was negative. The day of my dad's funeral. My OB called to check on me. Of course he knew the test was going to be negative, but he acted like he had hope. Through everything I could tell he REALLY wanted us to get pregnant.
Next came the referral to the horrid REs office. I could really tell that my OB did not want to let go of my treatment, but he kept telling me that delivering babies was his specialty, not fertility. And he really thought they could do more for me.
My referral was faxed to HRE (Horrid Reproductive Endocrinologist....That way I can keep up with the difference.....from now on they are HRE and WRE.....my new REs office is WRE, Wonderful Reproductive Endocrinologist.) on 2-5-07 after my follow-up appointment. My OB had already let me know that 150 mgs of clomid is all he felt comfortable with.
That day when I left his office was the first time I cried about my infertility. I was actually starting to realize that something was wrong. I still remember where I parked that day. I remember walking to my car. I called my husband and it scared him to death. I don't cry very often. We decided we were going to tell our parents. I told my mom and it answered so many of her questions. She is a pretty smart lady and knew something was up. I think my husbands parents were pretty surprised. We also told our bosses (well, mine already knew I was going to multiple appoints to see her husband, but his didn't). We made sure they were okay with us missing a lot of work, and they were both great and still are!
I just want to type this out because I don't want to forget it........it is really tough to sit in an OB office waiting to see him surrounded by a million pregnant women when you are there for infertility and you know everyone in there assumes you are pregnant. Especially when you see someone you know. Ugh. One day that I had to wait a pretty long time, I guess my OB could tell I was a little stressed and he told me not to sit in that waiting room again. He told me to call his nursing assistant (who I love) and tell her I was coming and they would let me in the back door and he would see me right then! Talk about VIP treatment. LOL! He told me to never sit in his waiting room again. No matter the reason I was there. Maybe because this is what I was used to, I had an even harder time transitioning to my HREs office.
Next time: First visit at the HRE.
Whew. I'm glad I typed that out, but it wasn't easy. Please forgive me. I'm not going to go back and read this post to proof read it. I just can't tonight.
No comments:
Post a Comment